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Saturday
Jun112011

Epic Summer Movie Post

So it's summer (well, at least it is in places that have actually seen the sun in the past...10 months...not Seattle...) and rather than doing a bunch of individual posts about the upcoming summer movies and whether they are worth seeing, I thought I'd just post one BIG one and update it as time goes on.  So without further pomp and/or circumstance... the summer movies:

The fact that Fast Five may go down as one of the Summer's top grossers is a frankly, a little baffling. Sure it had its moments, most notably the bombastic openings & closings. But the middle is filled with a mostly boring Ocean's 11 knock off that is missing what I was hoping for most: CAR RACING! Netflix it, maybe, if you've got nothing better to do... Now this is how you start a summer movie season. Kenneth Branaugh, known more for his Shakespearean directing than for ANY action movies, brings a classic take on dialog and drama to Marvel's traditional mix of colorful and adrenaline fueled effects sequences. Add the draw droppingly beautiful depiction of Asgard and some genuinely funny moments as Thor finds himself out of water on lowly planet Earth, and you've a great reasons to spend $10 at the theatre. Review: Pretty darn hilarious. Bridesmaids doesn't quite maintain the energy of the raw comic fire-hose that is the Hangover, and it is still VERY much a chick-flick, but there are enough steady gags to balance the tender moments to make the film's considerable run-time pass by in a grin-filled haze for both sexes. Men, you couldn't ask to be dragged to a better date movie. Perhaps the most pointless movie ever made. Pirates 4 maybe be 'On Stranger Tides' but it's got all the old familiar problems: An incomprehensible and exposition-ridden plot, action sequences that are higher in quantity than quality, and most sadly this time, an off-puttingly dull performance from Depp. There aren't even any cool or grandiose effects sequences this time, and don't get me started on the wacky, tacked in love story (which isn't the one you're expecting). The truly depressing thing is I actually really love this universe and the characters in it. I just wish they'd bottle it up till someone comes along with an actual good idea and and actual good script. That said, after watching the studios squeeze what may be THE WORST ENDING LINE IN A MOVIE EVER from Depp's Captain Jack (it literally made me squirm in my seat) I'm not sure there's enough water in the fountain of youth bring life back to this shipwreck of a franchise. The original Hangover was one of the funniest movies of the past few years, and though the sequel's premise is a little thin - yes, they blackout AGAIN - I think the Hangover's comedy trio is one of the freshest in film today. They say that funny things happen in threes, but for now we'll have to see if second time's the charm on May 26th. Kung Fu Panda is a great franchise and after its second round of stylized, martial arts mayhem, I think it's on track to continue to be that way. KFP2 isn't quite the bottle of pure joy the first one is, but it maintains the same stellar fight choreography that makes the franchise appealing to adult audiences, while Jack Black's goofball humor is sure to entertain the young'uns. A slightly darker tone, and somewhat meandering narrative bring this sequel down a few notches for me, but the continued insertion of cool 2D animation styles, a great new bad guy in the form of sinister Peacock, and an awesome new special move that Po must learn to defeat the bad-guy (very Karate Kid style) makes this film worth seeing. And see it in 3D, this is where that format shines. This film is a stunning achievement. It's truly something that I've never experienced before, and I think Terrance Malick might just be a genius...and totally CRAZY. I don't even really know what to call The Tree of Life. It's a bit like someone's old VHS home movies got mixed up with the home movies of the Universe. The only way the 'story' (and there is a story...sort of) maintains cohesion is by a deep, common thematic backbone, rather than a traditional narrative structure. That's probably why 99 out of 100 people will hate this... this thing that Malick has created. But there's a kind of mind that this movie is made for, and if you happened to be blessed/cursed with it, you are going to be swept away. I may go more in-depth in a full article review of The Tree of Life, because I don't think I can get across everything that I want to say in a few sentences, but it's truly a thing of beauty, and if you are brave enough, I hope you will see that, too. So I liked X-Men first class, and if you are interested definitely go see it, but it's not something I'd tell anyone to run out and see. There are some awesome things, the addition of some great acting talent in James McAvoy (as Professor X), Michael Fassbender (as Magneto), and a really stunning return to screen by Kevin Bacon (as rather scary villain), a sweet 1960s cold war aesthetic, and some great effects sequences (though most are showed off in the trailer). That said, all the great elements of this film don't really outweigh the snail pace of the first act, some real head-scratchers in the way characters go from good to evil at the flip of switch, and some truly pathetic attempts at creating pathos. And the action set pieces, while fun, don't hold a flame to any of the moments in X2. Thing film also seems to be missing a strong lead character, as neither Professor X or Magneto really brought the same kind of gravitas and bad-ass-ery as Wolverine did. See it, but maybe wait for it on Netflix. The single greatest point of praise I can give any movie is wanting to immediately see it again. As soon as the awesome credit sequence of Super 8 finished, i wanted to jump right back in line to see it again. It's by no means a perfect movie, and by many means it's a cut together slideshow of every Spielberg film ever made, but I LOVED this movie. LUUUVED it. I think if I were the age of the kids in this film, it would be my favorite movie of all time. The real flaw of the film is not what it does *poorly*, though the monster/sci-fi story feels a lot like it was spliced in (which it sort of was), but that it does anything but spending time with the absolutely tremendous cast of kids and their joyous antics of getting in and out of trouble. The monster movie isn't bad at all, but it's not the reason to see this film, nor is it really the point of the film. I wish that Abrams and Spielberg could have figured out someway to bring some of the pure heart that simply irradiates from the kids into the sci-fi story, but I'm perfectly happy to mix in a little above average chocolate when the peanut butter is SO DAMN TASTY. Seriously, why are you reading this? Go see Super 8 right now! Here's an easy review: It's not the worst thing I've seen this summer. Not exactly high praise, but this isn't the 20% rotten movie that rotten tomatoes makes it out to be. Green Lantern succeeds at opening up the curious sci-fi world of the Green Lantern Corp, a sort of intergalactic police force, but where it really fails is making you care about anyone in this world. It tries to straddle a world somewhere between the wit and playfulness of Iron Man and something more serious, but that just means over the half of the scenes involving people's lips moving will put you to sleep rather than make you chuckle. There's actually a really disturbing statement by the film-makers in the they handle one of the villains of this film, who slowly adopts more attributes of those marginalized by society as he becomes more 'evil,' but I'll assume that was mostly unintentional (otherwise it would be truly despicable). But yeah, don't run out and see this. Pick it up on Netflix if you care, but I'd personally shelve this with other 'who cares' super movies that all but the die-hard and cinematic completionists can probably do with out. I think critics have been looking for a way to cook the goose that lays the golden eggs since Brad Bird's Ratatouille took a swipe at their profession. Movies critics were out for blood (or in this case, motor oil) when Pixar's least critically loved franchise announced it would be returning to the big screen, and sure enough, with great gusto (Gusteau?) they handed wunderkind studio Pixar its first failing grade. So what movie were they watching, exactly? Cars 2 is a bombastic James Bond spy thriller done in the vivid, luscious, eye-candy-land world where cars, boats, and planes are the sentient species. Sure some of the jokes will roll an eye or two, and the script in general may not be up to Pixar's usual standard, and Larry the Cable Guy isn't likely to elicit as many chuckles or tears as last summer's Toy Story 3 or the previous year's Up did. But still, this is a FANTASTIC summer movie, in almost every way the superior of its predecessor, and by far the best 3D movie I have ever seen. The tide of ugliness on Rotten Tomatoes is a failing of the critical community to overcome their own need to slay giants, and fortunately I think the Box Office will prove that a critical Pixar 'flop' is worth a thousand Shrek sequels. Sigh... Yep. The nicest thing I can say about Transformers 3 was it was not as 'aggressively bad' as its previous incarnation. Michael Bay can string together explosions like he's making a popcorn necklace, and for my part I had an ok time as long as I wasn't focusing on gaping plot holes and a story that took its merry time getting to the big booms. The 3D was actually a HUGE boon to this film and I think something this franchise was sorely missing. When you add depth it really helps sort out the visual mess of mechanical mayhem. Bay has clearly stated he's stepping down from the series, but as much money as it took in, it will be fun to see who picks up the aftermath. Also, 3 cheers to Alan Tudyk. Put him in more movies. I think this movie was a failure of editing. You don't have to scrutinize too much to see that the conceit of this movie was get Sudekis, Bateman, and Day in front of a camera and have them improv off each other. Oh yeah, and throw a story in there. I'm not opposed to this approach to humor, in fact a surprising amount of great comedies are done this way, but it takes a good editor to make you think the comic bantering was scripted, and just a few too many smirks made there way into final print. Do yourself a favor. Go watch It's Always Sunny and Arrested Development. You'll have a better a time. This series has been a wild minecart ride of quality, and while director David Yates took a while to get his groove, I think he ended the longest running movie series of all time in way that critics and Potterheads a like can both be proud of. There were two things I wanted from this film: epic action (sorely missing in Part 1) and pathos (this is the end after all). I think DHP2 delivers both with a Helmsdeep-like assault on Hogwarts and very touching portrayal of loss and resilience in the face of death. Nothing ever quite recaptured the childlike magic of Chris Columbus's original, nor the madcap zaniness of Cuaron's Prison of Azkaban, but much like Potter practicing Potions, Death Hallows part 2 Exceeds Expecations. The final piece of the puzzle, too bad it's also potentially the goofiest. Captain America is going to struggle to keep its World War II origin story from seeming too campy, but if nothing else, it should at least be an entertaining diversion until 2012 when Iron Man, The Hulk, Thor, and Captain America will team up under Joss Whedon's directorial helm with The Avengers. Releases July 22nd. Cowboys...Oh, and Aliens, too! This movie just begs for more westerns. Not only is it SOOO refreshing to see Daniel Craig kicking but again like a Double-0, but Harrison Ford is suprisingly tolerable. Not forgive-you-for-Indy4 tolerable, but still a great addition to the western backdrop. The aliens I could take or leave. I don't know why so many recent alien films feel the need to make their extraterrestrials effectively lasergun totting velociraptors. It makes the film feel a bit more like Cowboys & Monsters, but bleed and die and soak up Colt .45 ammo well enough. If you read the title of this film and are at all interested, go see it. There are worse ways to waste a Netflix queue slot. I'm not entirely certain Andy Serkis is human. This is his second time portraying a simian cousin (having previously donned the blue suit and tracking balls for King Kong) but in many ways, Serkis's role as a genetically altered super ape Caesar is FAR more believable than James Franco's role as a brilliant scientist. Sadly I wish they had spent more time trying to justify Caesar's descent into open rebellion, rather than just throwing in a laughably 'goon' performance from Draco Malfoy, who spends his time oafishly droping quotes from the original Planet of the Apes like he REALLY need a job after Harry Potter. Fortunately there are some great WTF moments (which I won't spoil) that jolt some fresh energy in the film all leading to a fun CG showdown on the Golden Gate bridge. It's almost certain we'll see a sequel after the films surprise showing at the Box Office, and I'm excited to see where they take the story from here. Another comedy!?! Yep, and this time from the director of the fantastically funny Zombieland, starring Zombieland star Jessie Eisenberg in his first roll after portraying Facebook's founder. Co-starring the up-start stand-up legend Aziz Ansari, as well as the mullet haired goofball Danny McBride, this caper-comedy promises to give R-rated Hangover 2 a reasonable run for its money. Opens August 12th. One of the few movies to make decent waves at this year's Sundance, this action/thriller looks a lot like Spielberg's violent morality play Munich, without the tedious morality bit. The cast is solid, including Avatar star Sam Worthington, and the thrills seem genuine (I mean, there's an evil Nazi doctor!). Let's hope it can end out the summer with a proper bang on August 31st.

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